Why ALL of Us Should See “The Help”
Written by Renee Foster
August 10, 2011 - Today Disney & Dreamworks will open the film adaptation of NY Times best seller, “The Help” by Kathryn Stockett. This mid week debut is an effort to build word of mouth going into the official opening weekend. Starring Viola Davis, Octavia Spencer, Emma Stone, Bryce Dallas Howard and a stellar supporting cast, it is set in Mississippi on the cusp of the nascent civil rights movement.
You ask why we ALL need to see “The Help?” We all need to be reminded that for many people of color we are only possibly two generations removed from a family member who was a domestic worker. For many, only one generation if your family immigrated to the U.S. in the latter part of the 20th century. I am one of the former and a 1st generation New Yorker with roots firmly planted in the fertile soil of North & South Carolinas and Virginia where my own Grandmother Mrs. Ada Wall worked for Mrs. Pickett much to my Grandfather’s chagrin. For her it was an act of independence and defiance of his machismo that blossomed into a lifelong friendship between the two women. To further give this some historical context, reference Isabel Wilkerson’s excellent “The Warmth of Other Suns” about the great migration of Southern Blacks to northern cities and the west. My parents were each a part of that “Great Migration.” My Grandparents’ mandate to my Mother was simply “we did not send you to New York to do day work.” This setting the bar far above the life of a domestic worker was totally aspirational and was out of their desire to break that cycle for their daughter.
But we do need to be reminded of the singular dignity and determination of these women who served white families in an effort to elevate their own families out of poverty and racism by sheer dint of steely will and pragmatism. Ask an 
entire generation of white baby boomers who raised them and they will tell you it was their African American maid, nanny, house keeper etc. Equal parts humility and irony, these women were elevated beyond servant status in the hearts of the children they raised and the women who were dependent on them.
I am reminded of my great Aunts, maternal & paternal Grandmothers who have long since “gone home to glory” as they say in the South that worked for white women, but owned their own homes, fed and educated their own children while demanding and commanding the respect of these women and their own African American families. These women knew how to prepare and serve a Kosher Seder or set a table like nobody’s business.
Today I see their faces in the scores of nannies escorting predominately white children all over Manhattan. While many are from the Caribbean and or Central/South Americas, they share a universal theme with my women ancestors. They work hard; tolerate degrees of what is referred to as general “foolishness” and the personal foibles of their employers, send money home to help other family members and dream of a better future.
By seeing “The Help” we are reminded that we cannot afford to feel that we are so removed from their experiences. Racism is alive and well and not always as subtle as you may want to believe. See it and celebrate the unique style of love and nurturing only a woman of color can shower you with. See it in memory of their sacrifice, because no matter who or where you are, you certainly wouldn’t be who you are today without it.
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